My friend Rahul (name changed) has had a crush on Sheetal (name changed) since time immemorial. My guess is that all of his friends, including me, have at some point of time or the other played the relationship counselor to him-giving him suggestions to overcome his shyness, giving him support after the latest rejection, even subtly recommending him to Sheetal! But nothing has changed.
The other day he was asking me for suggestions. I told him, “Nothing changes if nothing changes. We can’t change anything for you. The only thing that can and should change in the whole scheme of things is YOU. If you want I can give you pointers for that.” Read on to find out my top 6 suggestions to him.
Shy guys don’t get any points from girls. Period. Why would a girl be your girlfriend? Because you’re a man. And being shy takes away significantly from your masculinity, in a girl’s eyes. One of the strategies commonly used for building confidence is projecting yourself as a confident person. Even if you don’t feel confident pretend to be confident-the attitude will probably soon enter your mind.
Bragging is the other extreme which you need to avoid like plague when it comes to impressing a girl. Are you one of those men who think talking about themselves and their achievements is a way of giving the girl reasons to like them? You couldn’t be more wrong. First of all truth speaks for itself. Everyone knows who you are and what you are (at least I hope so). If the girl finds that interesting she’ll be impressed, and if she doesn’t she won’t be. You can’t change anything by your words. Secondly people who brag come across as self-obsessed. At least I wouldn’t think of getting into a relationship with someone who’s so sickly in love with himself that he wouldn’t give me the importance of an equal.
Make her laugh:
A sense of humor is usually a major turn on for women. Making someone laugh is making a connection with the child inside them. If you can make a girl laugh you’re most likely already in her good books. Besides, every girl wants to be with someone they can look up to and admire. If you’re proud of your intelligence, making her laugh is the best way of showing it off.
Your looks matter:
If you’re under the impression that only women need to take care of their appearance and look beautiful, think again. A relationship is basically the human, civilized version of the primordial instincts nature has given us. And so looks helps create the first attraction. Pay attention to your clothes, hairstyle etc. before going to meet her.
Praise her looks subtly:
Nothing makes a girl feel more feminine than her physical beauty being appreciated by a man. Compliment her on her looks confidently. But do it subtly and never do it before you’ve known each other for some time. If she’s really beautiful you need to be extra cautious-she’s too used to compliments and will write you off as just another honey-thirsty bee if the first thing you say to her is a compliment on her looks!
Be a friend:
If you want to earn a girl’s trust you have to first be her friend. Never make the mistake of hinting her of your romantic ambitions right from the word go. Spend some time getting to know her as a person, finding out about her beliefs, likes and dislikes, ambitions, hobbies and philosophy of life. If you have taken due care to really understand her, you’re almost sure to earn her affection in the near future.
Anything important that I missed out?