How to Flirt with a Girl – 5 Rules for Flirting with Indian Girls

How to Flirt – 5 Rules for Flirting with Indian Girls

“How to flirt with the girl at school/college/work I’ve started liking? Please help. I don’t know where to start from.”

After What to do? My parents are not agreeing to my marriage!! and Should I break up??, the commonly asked question which I’ve decided to tackle today is “How to flirt with Indian girls?”

If I were not allowed to respond to that with more than just ONE sentence, that sentence would be:

Women like men, not boys.

how to flirt with girlsPhoto by diemolu

All the rules of my How to Flirt With Indian Women 101 which I’m going to lay down below are derivative of this one basic rule.

#1.Start flirting with her online

Most guys feel shy to start a conversation with a girl face to face. If you’re wondering “How to flirt with a girl if facing her makes me nervous?” – don’t worry; turn to online chat (even if you know your girl in real life). Not having to face or directly talk to the girl you like takes the pressure off to a great extent and helps you be yourself, which is the first step of flirting successfully.

#2.Never show desperation while flirting with a girl

Nothing turns girls off more than under-confident desperation. I’ve already talked about this in the discussion on how to impress girls. It’s equally pertinent to the one on how to flirt with girls. Don’t be apologetic for taking her time (girls hate that). Don’t ping her saying “hi”. Ping her saying, “Hi XYZ! How’re you doing?” In case she doesn’t reply the first time you ping her, never use the same opening line the next time. Start by something like, “Hey XYZ! The ABC video you’d shared was hilarious. Where did you find it?” It shows you’re not talking to her because you’re desperate, but because you’ve got something real to say. You get the point.

#3.Don’t give it ALL

A corollary of point #2 is – don’t be her dog. You’re flirting with your girl; you’re not her boyfriend yet. You need to attract her first, before you show her how responsible you are. So while flirting with a girl, don’t be the oh-so-caring I’ll-do-anything-for-you-including-daily-chores man-in-waiting of hers – that can wait for life after marriage. :P For now, that kind of behaviour will make her like you as a friend and a pet – not as a man she feels attracted to.

#4.Complimenting her is a must

If you want to successfully flirt with a girl – especially an Indian girl – striking a balance between sounding hungry and sounding bold is key. Don’t start with, “Hey! You’re looking hot in that photo you recently posted. ;)” On the other hand, if it has been a week that you’ve started talking/chatting with her and you haven’t actually gotten around to complimenting her even once yet, chances are you’re not going anywhere. Compliments don’t always have to be on her looks. And they need to sound natural, casual and confident. Which brings me to …

how to flirt with girlsPhoto by CubaGallery

#5.Test waters continuously while flirting with a girl

Each girl has her distinct level of comfort with flirting. Some stop talking to you if you call them hot, while some feel offended if you don’t. ;) Continuously test her limits while flirting with a girl. Try a hint, like, “You’re the most interesting girl I know.” If she responds favourably (favourable responses include :P ;) J), after a few days try, “Of late I’ve started looking forward to you coming online every day.” If that goes ok too, try, “If you were not so busy, I’d have loved to go for a coffee with you sometime.” You get the point. You need to be bold enough fast enough to hold her interest, while making sure you don’t offend her.

What are the golden rules which worked when you started flirting with your girl? Let me know by leaving a comment. 

45 thoughts on “How to Flirt with a Girl – 5 Rules for Flirting with Indian Girls”

  1. Some stop talking to you if you call them hot, while some feel offended if you don’t.
    Lolzzz… yeah we know how true that is and how confounding that is to well-meaning innocent boys. :P

      1. That’s a great post :-)

        To flirt with a girl, you have to be positive first..

        If you keep smiling every time, the girl you like will be more attracted to you.. Then, you can approach her and give compliments by making an eye contact.. Letting her know that you like her is also a great way to flirt with a girl..

        Thanks for a great post :)

  2. You’re so right about the desperation bit. Till date I’ve never been able to bring myself up to responding to guy who pings me on Facebook with stuff like that.

  3. One more very important point – SPEND LOADS ON HER! That’s the surefire way of impressing any Indian girl. And if that’s not there, there’s no other way of doing it.
    :D

    1. It’s unfortunate Raj that a disturbing majority of young girls tend to conform to the negative stereotypes like the one you’ve portrayed.
      But I can assure you any demands of spending lots on her is something which you should NEVER relent to.
      Why?
      If that’s the only way of keeping her interested in you, let her go as fast as she can run. ;)
      If that’s not the case, she’ll not behave that way. Trust me, 100% of girls are not like that. :)

      1. “Disturbing Majority” well i dont blame u gals… if the girl is sweet enough to understand her so called friends spoil her . anyways in the end i’d say jus a 4% of girls aren’t of the negative stereotype. well either ways it is up to the guy to handle both types of girls.. i shall be true to the word We still have a few really sweet girls around to have a wonderful relation with // so kudos to our beloved country ;)

      2. I disagree. If you spend loads of money on a girl – you don’t really impress or attract her, she just hangs around you so that she can freeload off you. There is a specific tag attached to this type of women. Rest assured, it is a more indirect form of prostitution. The moment the money stops running, you wouldn’t know what hit you – before she disappears.

        And this is not just an Indian women thing. Indian women are more direct when it comes to gold digging, because it is socially accepted for women to do so AND for men to be so desperate that they’d use money as a bait to ‘impress’ girls.

  4. Now with d increasing awareness levels (courtesy media & other sources) its becoming increasingly difficult to communicate with girls (forget about approaching them)…They become sceptical even if males approach them for some genuine reason(not flirting). “I don’t want to live on this planet anymore”-Facebook quote

    1. Thanks for bringing that up swapnil. Well caution taken to the level of panic never helps anyone.
      It’s unfortunate that in this country romantic relationships and sexual harassment are somehow considered related.

    1. Hmm. Tricky question Vivek.
      I’ll tell you the truth.
      At the risk of getting cyber-stones thrown at my cyber-head.
      Most women (myself included) love flirting – in some way or the other. For many, it’s recreational, it’s exciting – it gives them a high (even though most of them will never admit that ;)). And – this is important – this may not always have anything to do with real love. For example I can easily visualize a married woman enjoying a few minutes of harmless online flirting without even thinking about being unfaithful to her husband – that is, without having any intention of getting into anything more serious with the guy she’s flirting with. This is flirting as entertainment – flirting for the sake of flirting. I don’t see much wrong with this. If you’re after some light fun and enjoyment you can try this with a married woman only if you’re certain she’s ok with it. The dangers of going ahead without testing the waters here (see point #5) need no emphasis, especially in India.
      However if you’re saying “you don’t want anyone but her”, I assume you’re looking for more than fun. ;) And that, is extremely serious business, especially in India.
      Are you talking in love with a married woman?
      Is the lady also in love with you?
      If not, are you at least sure she’s (for whatever reason – abusive husband, lack of compatibility, infidelity by husband) not in love with her husband?
      Your course of action would depend on the answers to the above questions.
      Rule #1 of expressing interest in married people – whatever you do, don’t ever do anything that insults their spouse. You don’t have that right unless you’ve been given that right.
      Let me explain. For example, let’s say you don’t know much about the state of this lady’s relationship with her husband. They might be in love with each other like a “normal” couple. Or they may not be. You don’t know.
      Now. You can start flirting with her lightly. But the message you convey should be limited to, “I admire you, I’m enamoured by you, I think you’re special.” It should never be, “I want you as my girlfriend.”
      Do you see the difference?
      For example, you can try, “I’ve admired you from a distance for a very long time. You’re attractive and intelligent – a rare combination.”
      Even if she gives you positive indications, you should never ever say, “Baby!” Or “Can I call you sometime when your husband is not at home?” These are direct indications of you wanting her as your girlfriend. And you don’t know yet whether she’s in love with her husband or not. So this kinda stuff is a strict no-no.
      Does that help? I’d really like to know.

  5. Hello loveinindia,
    Thanks for this wonderful explanation, Now I just mean to say, Flirting with a married women, may be dangerous for her life & relation. Suppose I’m flirting with you (Married Women) & you coming in touch with me slowly slowly & going to having lot of chat with me more than your husband than flirting is ending your married life. It means is flirting with a married women isn’t god.

  6. Rules which worked for me… I was always myself… She always felt secure & safe with me … others might feel “he is cracking pj’s”, but with her, my jokes were a huge hit-she always laughed…there was a natural, spontaneous connection…sense of humor

    of course compliments, gifts, movies, good food etc,

    i always managed to pull her out of d hot-soup she used 2 keep landing up into…

    1. Here’s the first thing that you need – overcoming your lack of confidence. Proposing a Girl-Tips for Overcoming Shyness

      Always remember the following:

      Women want men, not boys.

      Be proud of who you are and show it. Inner confidence is always the first thing that helps cinch the deal for a guy.
      Here are some more tips to help you out:

      How to Impress a Girl into Liking You: 6 Tips
      How to Impress Your Girlfriend
      How to Flirt with a Girl – 5 Rules for Flirting with Indian Girls
      Top 5 First Date Mistakes Men Make
      Proposing a Girl-Tips for Overcoming Shyness
      The Ideal Time to Propose to a Girl

      Let me know how things go. :)

  7. Flirting seems to be easy when one doesn’t mean to flirt but naturally and unconsciously does so without realizing. Self consciousness is removed then.

    1. Flirting comes naturally to some. Others can genuinely benefit from keeping a few basic principles in mind. Thanks for commenting Adhrit. :)

  8. hi dude..
    i like a girl so much ..n she is my classmate too..i often see her while class is running..n she too.
    when we got eye contact..we smile.
    now i want to know that have she any bf or not & also want her contect no or fb id..please help me ..how to ask her about it ?

  9. There is this one girl in my class that I complement a lot and we talk only during class cuz she don’t have a phone nor do a computer because she lives in a hostile but anyways I love her but I don’t no if she loves me so I was thinking of writing her a letter that expresses my feeling that I have for her.

    1. Well depends on the type of girl you’re dating. If she comes from a relatively liberal background – of course. If not – well, you’re in for a lot of battles. But if she has some courage and really believes in you, hopefully it should be possible.

  10. hi ,i m 2nd year degree student i would like to propose to my classmate . her chararacter is shy ,she never talk too much but she knows that i m loving her. she is a village girl that she is not interested in social medias . she never look any guy’s face. she is just as a programmed pc she is always to get a bus as soon as poosible. she dont have any boy friends . may be itz infactuation.but i realy love her.please help me out yar.

  11. hi, i m eli when i proposed to my classmate she reject it with a smile . how could i propose again her because i m lov with her. she’s malayaly too yar. please help me out

  12. i feel its not easy to impres an Indian girl. they r always so skeptical and doubt a lot. Hats off to the guys who manage to attract an unknown Indian girl on networking sites like fb and even manage to marry them in due course . any tips on fb dating ? because these days anybody can send a fren request to anybody . so its becoming increasingly difficult for girls to trust one particular person in this rat race :D..

  13. I am felling shy to talk to that girl.what if she doesn’t talk back, like that. And she also speaks to many boys. How should I start a conversation with her?

  14. hmmm… good tips but I m chatting with a girl on fb n wanna propose her but I m shy of telling her that I like her…..she replys me every time n if I like her pic n comment then she likes my comment…is she also like me.. what should I do in this case??? how would I impress her?
    I m in Live with her…

  15. There is a girl who lives near by. i like her too much but whenever i am trying to talk to her,ask her name she never respond and goes away immediately.she tries to show that she alraedy has a bf(by talking with her bf on phone infront of me).she is completely unknown to me. she daily goes to college in the morning. i am planning to talk with her on the way. plz help me how to make her my friend or bf..

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