How to Flirt – 5 Rules for Flirting with Indian Girls
“How to flirt with the girl at school/college/work I’ve started liking? Please help. I don’t know where to start from.”
After What to do? My parents are not agreeing to my marriage!! and Should I break up??, the commonly asked question which I’ve decided to tackle today is “How to flirt with Indian girls?”
If I were not allowed to respond to that with more than just ONE sentence, that sentence would be:
Women like men, not boys.
Photo by diemoluAll the rules of my How to Flirt With Indian Women 101 which I’m going to lay down below are derivative of this one basic rule.
#1.Start flirting with her online
Most guys feel shy to start a conversation with a girl face to face. If you’re wondering “How to flirt with a girl if facing her makes me nervous?” – don’t worry; turn to online chat (even if you know your girl in real life). Not having to face or directly talk to the girl you like takes the pressure off to a great extent and helps you be yourself, which is the first step of flirting successfully.
#2.Never show desperation while flirting with a girl
Nothing turns girls off more than under-confident desperation. I’ve already talked about this in the discussion on how to impress girls. It’s equally pertinent to the one on how to flirt with girls. Don’t be apologetic for taking her time (girls hate that). Don’t ping her saying “hi”. Ping her saying, “Hi XYZ! How’re you doing?” In case she doesn’t reply the first time you ping her, never use the same opening line the next time. Start by something like, “Hey XYZ! The ABC video you’d shared was hilarious. Where did you find it?” It shows you’re not talking to her because you’re desperate, but because you’ve got something real to say. You get the point.
#3.Don’t give it ALL
A corollary of point #2 is – don’t be her dog. You’re flirting with your girl; you’re not her boyfriend yet. You need to attract her first, before you show her how responsible you are. So while flirting with a girl, don’t be the oh-so-caring I’ll-do-anything-for-you-including-daily-chores man-in-waiting of hers – that can wait for life after marriage. :P For now, that kind of behaviour will make her like you as a friend and a pet – not as a man she feels attracted to.
#4.Complimenting her is a must
If you want to successfully flirt with a girl – especially an Indian girl – striking a balance between sounding hungry and sounding bold is key. Don’t start with, “Hey! You’re looking hot in that photo you recently posted. ;)” On the other hand, if it has been a week that you’ve started talking/chatting with her and you haven’t actually gotten around to complimenting her even once yet, chances are you’re not going anywhere. Compliments don’t always have to be on her looks. And they need to sound natural, casual and confident. Which brings me to …
Photo by CubaGallery#5.Test waters continuously while flirting with a girl
Each girl has her distinct level of comfort with flirting. Some stop talking to you if you call them hot, while some feel offended if you don’t. ;) Continuously test her limits while flirting with a girl. Try a hint, like, “You’re the most interesting girl I know.” If she responds favourably (favourable responses include :P ;) J), after a few days try, “Of late I’ve started looking forward to you coming online every day.” If that goes ok too, try, “If you were not so busy, I’d have loved to go for a coffee with you sometime.” You get the point. You need to be bold enough fast enough to hold her interest, while making sure you don’t offend her.
What are the golden rules which worked when you started flirting with your girl? Let me know by leaving a comment.
Some stop talking to you if you call them hot, while some feel offended if you don’t.
Lolzzz… yeah we know how true that is and how confounding that is to well-meaning innocent boys. :P
:P .. Thanks for dropping by Deepak.
You’re so right about the desperation bit. Till date I’ve never been able to bring myself up to responding to guy who pings me on Facebook with stuff like that.
We all know how irritating it feels at times. ;)
One more very important point – SPEND LOADS ON HER! That’s the surefire way of impressing any Indian girl. And if that’s not there, there’s no other way of doing it.
:D
It’s unfortunate Raj that a disturbing majority of young girls tend to conform to the negative stereotypes like the one you’ve portrayed.
But I can assure you any demands of spending lots on her is something which you should NEVER relent to.
Why?
If that’s the only way of keeping her interested in you, let her go as fast as she can run. ;)
If that’s not the case, she’ll not behave that way. Trust me, 100% of girls are not like that. :)
sure not 100% , but majority of girls, that is sure.
Hmmm…Amit…yeah..I know…unfortunate… :(
Thanks for dropping by. :)
“Disturbing Majority” well i dont blame u gals… if the girl is sweet enough to understand her so called friends spoil her . anyways in the end i’d say jus a 4% of girls aren’t of the negative stereotype. well either ways it is up to the guy to handle both types of girls.. i shall be true to the word We still have a few really sweet girls around to have a wonderful relation with // so kudos to our beloved country ;)
Now with d increasing awareness levels (courtesy media & other sources) its becoming increasingly difficult to communicate with girls (forget about approaching them)…They become sceptical even if males approach them for some genuine reason(not flirting). “I don’t want to live on this planet anymore”-Facebook quote
Thanks for bringing that up swapnil. Well caution taken to the level of panic never helps anyone.
It’s unfortunate that in this country romantic relationships and sexual harassment are somehow considered related.
Hello,
Will these techniques work on a married woman? The one I’m thinking of is the girl of my dreams, and I don’t want anybody else but her.
Hmm. Tricky question Vivek.
I’ll tell you the truth.
At the risk of getting cyber-stones thrown at my cyber-head.
Most women (myself included) love flirting – in some way or the other. For many, it’s recreational, it’s exciting – it gives them a high (even though most of them will never admit that ;)). And – this is important – this may not always have anything to do with real love. For example I can easily visualize a married woman enjoying a few minutes of harmless online flirting without even thinking about being unfaithful to her husband – that is, without having any intention of getting into anything more serious with the guy she’s flirting with. This is flirting as entertainment – flirting for the sake of flirting. I don’t see much wrong with this. If you’re after some light fun and enjoyment you can try this with a married woman only if you’re certain she’s ok with it. The dangers of going ahead without testing the waters here (see point #5) need no emphasis, especially in India.
However if you’re saying “you don’t want anyone but her”, I assume you’re looking for more than fun. ;) And that, is extremely serious business, especially in India.
Are you talking in love with a married woman?
Is the lady also in love with you?
If not, are you at least sure she’s (for whatever reason – abusive husband, lack of compatibility, infidelity by husband) not in love with her husband?
Your course of action would depend on the answers to the above questions.
Rule #1 of expressing interest in married people – whatever you do, don’t ever do anything that insults their spouse. You don’t have that right unless you’ve been given that right.
Let me explain. For example, let’s say you don’t know much about the state of this lady’s relationship with her husband. They might be in love with each other like a “normal” couple. Or they may not be. You don’t know.
Now. You can start flirting with her lightly. But the message you convey should be limited to, “I admire you, I’m enamoured by you, I think you’re special.” It should never be, “I want you as my girlfriend.”
Do you see the difference?
For example, you can try, “I’ve admired you from a distance for a very long time. You’re attractive and intelligent – a rare combination.”
Even if she gives you positive indications, you should never ever say, “Baby!” Or “Can I call you sometime when your husband is not at home?” These are direct indications of you wanting her as your girlfriend. And you don’t know yet whether she’s in love with her husband or not. So this kinda stuff is a strict no-no.
Does that help? I’d really like to know.
Hello loveinindia,
Thanks for this wonderful explanation, Now I just mean to say, Flirting with a married women, may be dangerous for her life & relation. Suppose I’m flirting with you (Married Women) & you coming in touch with me slowly slowly & going to having lot of chat with me more than your husband than flirting is ending your married life. It means is flirting with a married women isn’t god.
good stuff!!!!!!!!
Rules which worked for me… I was always myself… She always felt secure & safe with me … others might feel “he is cracking pj’s”, but with her, my jokes were a huge hit-she always laughed…there was a natural, spontaneous connection…sense of humor
of course compliments, gifts, movies, good food etc,
i always managed to pull her out of d hot-soup she used 2 keep landing up into…
when i see the girls all courage turns to water whom i don’t know,so ‘ll u help me on that?
Here’s the first thing that you need – overcoming your lack of confidence. Proposing a Girl-Tips for Overcoming Shyness
Always remember the following:
Women want men, not boys.
Be proud of who you are and show it. Inner confidence is always the first thing that helps cinch the deal for a guy.
Here are some more tips to help you out:
How to Impress a Girl into Liking You: 6 Tips
How to Impress Your Girlfriend
How to Flirt with a Girl – 5 Rules for Flirting with Indian Girls
Top 5 First Date Mistakes Men Make
Proposing a Girl-Tips for Overcoming Shyness
The Ideal Time to Propose to a Girl
Let me know how things go. :)
wud u like to help me ..?
Yeah you can email me at sulagna@loveinindia.co.in :)